“Ring, Ring, Ring…Meeeeeerry Christmas!” says the Red Cross, bell-ringing, money-collecting volunteer in his red vest and Santa hat. I really do loves those guys, and I love the cause, but that little sound triggers two parts of my brain. The first side of my brain is happy and excited about his oh-so-premature presence as it gets me in the spirit of Christmas and Thanksgiving. The other side of my brain cringes in anticipation of the behaviors that will start to surface with this time of year.

It’s taken me quite awhile to put my finger on why my kids with Behavior Disorders and Autism seem so “off” in October, November and December. After collecting years of data on behavior and antecedents for particular behaviors, I think a lot of it comes from the lack of structure combined with the sensory overload that accompany the holidays.

LACK OF STRUCTURE: When structure is initially implemented, these kids resist it, and there will likely be a heightened frequency and intensity of behavior. Implementing structure is a transition for kids. Often times, as a teacher, you consider transition the times between classes, lunch and grade levels. Transition doesn’t stop there. Transition is constant in the minds of children with Autism and Behavior Disorders.

Think about this, Little Timmy, flaming in all his EBD glory, has been in school since August. It’s mid September now, and he is starting to get into his routine at school. He has a place to sit in the overly-stimulating cafeteria. He sits with two other boys, and they talk about Legos and the cute girl who doesn’t know they exist. He has finally mastered opening his locker without having to ask for help from a teacher which for eight weeks has opened the door for ridicule from his peers with superior adaptive skills. He made his first C on a test after ripping up the first three which were hand delivered to him with a bright red F on the front page. This test is on the fridge at home next to his gifted brother’s stack of A+ tests which require magnetic reinforcement to hold them all in place. Timmy’s parents notice that he is waking up on his own and genuinely looking forward to getting on the bus to come to his structure-based classroom. Timmy is making progress.

Six weeks pass, and now he is really rocking. In some situations, he is even a leader. He simply knows what to expect, and he is covered in positive reinforcement. Now here comes Halloween. Everyone is buzzing about what they plan to be and what their favorite candy is. They discuss the plans for the typical teenage pranks and decide what neighborhood to meet in. Its’ then that it hits Timmy; Timmy’s life and friends are solely based inside the walls of the school. His friends don’t bleed into his home life. Timmy missed his friends at school because those are the ones with which he found commonalities.

Timmy gets sad inside and he starts to withdraw from the successes he has been riding on for the last two months. Timmy is sad, but again he doesn’t know why and doesn’t know how to tell anyone that he is sad. He Speaks Behavior. Timmy toughs through and is anxious to get back after the hype of Halloween simmers down.

Two weeks pass, and Timmy is back in his rhythm. Yes, one day (Hype-o-Ween) takes two weeks to reestablish that routine for most kids. Halloween is behind him, and he is rocking and rolling his way along. And then it hits him, he has two more weeks until it’s Thanksgiving, another long break. This break is not structured. Here comes the behavior again. He is trying to hold it together as he knows he needs to embrace the last two weeks he has, but he simply doesn’t know how to balance the anxiety/excitement of the break and the happiness he unknowingly finds in his routine at school. Hello Behavior, how I have missed you!

SOLUTION: Provide Timmy with what to expect for these breaks. He needs to know that there will be structure. I encourage the parents of these kiddos to ask the teacher for what they can implement at home that will help him have structure. Create a schedule for Timmy. Make it visual and realistic. Schedule relaxation time. Schedule video game time, but allow him to earn more than the schedule allows. Explain this to him. Timmy needs structure. He needs to know what is happening next and next and next and next.

SENSORY OVERLOAD: If I listed the sensory triggers than accompany Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas, I would have an endless blog entry. When I walk into Starbucks in October, I absolutely love the smell of a Pumpkin Latte. November rolls around and you walk through the wall of Cinnamon Broom smells at every grocery store. December hits and you have to walk past the ear-piercing ring of the Red Cross man to get into the store that is blasting Christmas tunes with squeaky chipmunks and catchy choruses. Within the store there are blinky lights, bright lights, blue lights and white lights. There are moving Santas and inflatable reindeer marching across the lawn section at the Home Depot. Everything around you is moving and bright and smelly. You don’t have sensory issues, so you take it all in and experience the love and warmth that comes with the holiday season.

Then there is Timmy. All of the above sensory stimuli just about push Timmy off the edge. For Timmy, a family gathering full of stories, laughter and clicking of silverware on China plates may sound like a freight train in his head. For Timmy, the mall is just way too much. For Timmy, blinky lights are the enemy and he just wants them to turn off. Timmy wants to be in his comfortable 74 degree classroom, with the lights out and the ambient light shining through his wall of windows. His classroom is quite and all he hears is the sound of the heat coming through the vents. The room smells like concrete and textbooks. Timmy likes it here.

SOLUTION: Allow Timmy to wear his headphones to the mall if he MUST go. Let Timmy pick out the Christmas decorations and be sure to ask him which Christmas lights make him feel the most comfortable (be prepared to have a blue Christmas). Allow him to help decide where the tree will go and how many ornaments would look good on the tree (be prepared if he isn’t interested in ornaments at all- it’s ok) . Before buying a huge animated inflatable for the front yard, ask Timmy if he likes those or if they just plain creep him out. You just may end up with an extra $100 in your pocket for the Red Cross Ringer.

In summary, be aware of these sweet children and their needs. Do not assume that Christmas tree scent, blinky icicle lights and hectic trips to the mall are in the best interest of them. Be patient with them as they attempt to adapt to the lack of their structure. Help them feel safe. At some point, as parents and teachers, we have to be ok with letting go of our traditions and begin creating a comfortable tradition for our special ones.

‘Tis The Season!